I'm Back!

Oh my, it has been a while.  My last post was October 2019!  Well, we all know what happened shortly after that.  I have so much respect for those who were able to keep writing, create materials to share, etc.  I on the other hand, was in triage mode for a few months and then I just lost my motivation.  Being thrust into teletherapy overnight was one of the hardest things I ever did and yet, I remain grateful because I learned so much.  Yes, I was strapped to my computer 8-10 hours per day planning.  Yes, I live in a rural area and had TERRIBLE WiFi.  Yes, I was anxious about what we were experiencing, but I embraced the situation and used strategies, techniques, and technology that allowed for quality therapy.  In the grand scheme of things for me, that piece only lasted 3 months.  We did offer Extended School Year remotely, but I was able to go into the building and use the WiFi which was a game changer.  

We returned to in-person education for the 2020-21 school year and I am so grateful for that.  It was actually a wonderful year.  My speech assistant and I were creative and effective in providing the level of speech-language therapy we knew our kids deserved, and we were face to face (with a little plexiglass between us).   Nevertheless, I was a little older, a little more tired, and a lot out of the blogging world.  

Two years later, here I am.  The 2021-22 and 2022-23 school years flew by and in September 2022, I made the difficult decision to retire from the my school-based career.

Peace Out! I'm retired!

I know it's not a popular opinion, but I loved my school-based career.   I've done what I love and I still love what I do.  It hasn't been perfect, but it's been perfect for me.  The last 20 years I've worked in a school with people who are my friends.  I was able to work in my community in the school my children attended.  There were struggles, there were years I thought "I can't do this anymore."  There were people who challenged my ability to exercise self-control, but I overcame and outlasted them.  Over the course of 39 years, I refined who I am as an SLP, a Mom, a friend, a wife, and more.  I discovered my resilience and my worth and I made it to that finish line.  I owe a debt of gratitude to those who had a hand in closing that chapter.  My students who inspired me to continue learning and never settle into complacency.  My colleagues who helped me navigate the "crazy years" and turned my tears into laughter.  My online community (Splitcoast Speechies, Frenzied SLPs) who helped me realized what I actually am capable of.  My friends who who bless me with their companionship and loyalty.  My family who are my biggest cheerleaders.  My children who are the joys of my life and my best work.  My husband who for 34 years has stood by my side or carried me depending on the day. I love you so.

What's next?  I'm not done yet!  I'm on to my next great adventure.  In all this I've continued to hone my skills as a clinician and the logical next step is to take Doyle Speech Works into the private practice world.

I've rented an office, moved my materials, and set up shop.  It's a beautiful old building and I love the color I chose for the walls.  The brick is one of my favorite features.  It's small, but I don't plan on groups!  Extra bonus; it's above a wonderful market and coffee shop.  I began seeing clients in May and I absolutely love it.  There were quite a few logistical tasks to accomplish and I am NOT a business person...yet.  I'm figuring it out with the help of some friends and professionals.  I truly enjoy sitting at my desk, planning therapy and doing a little paperwork.  My plan is to work 3 days a week, I am retired after all. :) I am also not completely out of the schools, as I've contracted with our district to work in the high school 2 days.  Ironically, my first job, in 1983, was in a high school!  I was 22 years old and my students were 18.  Crazy!  It seems I've come full circle.

The goal for my resurrected blog is to continue to share my journey as well as activities and suggestions that I've found helpful.  I don't know if blogs are passé, but I'm excited to write again.  Until next time...

Making the Case for Educational Impact in Articulation Therapy

Over the past nearly 40 years I've heard a lot of conversation around articulation therapy and "educational impact."  To this day the discussion continues to center around whether students who exhibit what may be considered mild speech sound disorders (SSD) like a lisp, are eligible for services because their difficulties don't impact academics. For instance, these children are not writing "thun" instead of "sun." Historically then, articulation therapy in the school setting may not be provided. The notion of not providing services because there is no "impact" on academics narrowly restricts the definition of educational impact. Personally, I consider any speech sound disorder as just that, a speech sound disorder, and have come to consider educational impact as a euphemism for “keeping caseloads low” and ignoring basic communication even as it relates to CCSS.  This distresses me. I am passionate about what we do and I don't like when we allow bureaucracy or misinterpretation to interfere with our responsibility. I'm taking a grave risk of overwhelming you, dear reader, and I understand the concerns around massive caseloads and staggering special education numbers, I'm sharing, nonetheless.

1. When I graduated in 1983, I had to have certification to work in the schools in NJ. My certification was as a Speech Correctionist! Working on SSD was a huge part of our job, whether mild or severe.
2. From 1985-87, when working as an itinerant SLP for Essex County Educational Services Commission, servicing the nonpublic schools, we ONLY worked on articulation.
3. The criteria and interpretation for educational impact varies from state to state.
4. Educational impact is subjective and too narrowly defined.
5. Educational impact should include things like: calls attention to the student, socially isolates them, causes peers to comment or tease, interferes with establishing peer relationships, and causes embarrassment or frustration to the child. 
6. Untreated speech sound disorders have the potential to impact individuals across the life span in terms of social stigma and economics as it relates to employment. 
7. The following was included in a letter to Stan Dublinske, the ASHA Director of School Services in 1980, from the Department of Health, Education, and Welfare and explores the problem with the term educational impact: "The broad issue raised in your inquiry is whether the definition of "speech impaired" in the regulations implementing the Education of the Handicapped Act, Part B (as amended by P.L. 94-142) is interpreted to mean that children with communicative disorders who have no other handicapping condition are ineligible for services as "handicapped children" unless educational assessments indicate concomitant problems in academic achievement. An interpretation is needed because "educational performance" is not specifically defined in the Part B regulations. However, the standard for determining whether a child fits into any of the categories of handicaps listed in the Act and regulations is that the impairment "adversely affects a child's educational performance." Under Section 602(1) of the Act, a child with one of the listed impairments must need special education to be a "handicapped child". For children who need a "related service" but no other. special education services, the Part B regulations in section 121a.14(a)(2) allow a State to consider that service as "special. education", bringing those children within the scope of the Act. . I agree that an interpretation which denies needed services to speech impaired children who have no problem in academic performance is unreasonably restrictive in effect and inconsistent with the intent of the Act and regulations." 
8. In an article written in 2002 for ASHA's Perspectives for School Based Issues, Stan Dublinske wrote, "It was ASHA's position that local education agencies requiring such educational assessments and denying services to children with obvious speech or language impairments because they did not have a concomitant problem in academic achievement were using a very narrow definition of "educational performance." In various discussions with staff in the now Office of Special Education Programs (OSEP), ASHA explained that "educational performance" included performance in communication. At that time there was a big push to ensure that all school children acquire "basic skills." ASHA made the point that mastery of "effective oral communication" was a basic skill. As a result, a speech or language impairment necessarily adversely affects educational performance. Therefore, children needing speech-language pathology services should not be denied services just because they do not show discrepancies in age/grade performance in academic subject-matter areas."
9. Students can receive articulation therapy if a school does due diligence via a multi-tiered system of support.

Enter Response to Intervention, (now merged with Positive Behavior Intervention and Supports; PBIS) and called a Multi-Tiered System of Support (MTSS).  MTSS is a three-tiered framework offering support for ALL learners, advanced and struggling alike. Tier 1 supports the entire child and is appropriate for all students and aligns with core standards. Tier 2 offers support for students who need supplemental services beyond what can be provided within the context of core instruction. It is specifically focused on an area of need and is more short-term. Tier 3 addresses unique needs and individualized support and typically is done via special education.

I provide therapy for mild SSD through tier 2. Students are offered articulation therapy with an emphasis on home and school collaboration for approximately 12 weeks. Speech sessions are only 15 minutes long two times per week and involve quick, motivating drills with 100 repetitions (phew). Parents are asked to come in for a brief meeting so I can explain their role and how they can help their child while supporting what I do at school. I do give students homework and ask that it is practiced four times per week for only 5-10 minutes.  If students are making progress and practicing with an adult partner at home, but haven't begun carryover, I will continue to a point I feel generalization can occur organically. 

This is my bottom line; any judgment of educational impact must factor in the whole child including social-emotional and the core standards of speaking and listening. In addition, the implications on future employment and social stigma cannot be ignored. As highly trained professionals it is on us to provide articulation therapy while fostering collaboration with parents to support our therapy. Speech therapy for mild SSD can be so rewarding as the outcomes are often favorable. I once received a note from a middle school student depicting me soaring through the air with my cape flowing behind me as I said, "Ssssssssss!" It was a thank you note. I knew what correcting that lisp meant to that child and I was pleased to do it.

An Inspiring Example of the Communication Connection

Image by Quinn Kampschroer from Pixabay

Today was my first day back to work after a wonderful summer. I love summer vacation, make no mistake, but I also like getting back into my routine. I enjoy fall, yet late summer is amazing! Tourists go home. My kayak isn't tossed about by the wake of the motor boats. I can hear the birds instead of blaring radios. It becomes cooler to hike and the bugs start to disappear. It's truly a great time of year.

As I returned to work, the importance of what we do as SLPs (and educators) wasn't lost on me. We know communication is connection. We know the cost of when the intimacy of conversation is lost. I was reminded of how valuable communication is, beyond how we form sounds or sentences, beyond assessments and Facebook controversies, this past winter.

Our son, Mack was traveling from New York City home to NH for the holidays. It was his first year of college and we couldn't wait to see him, to hold him, to talk to him. As he was heading to the bus stop, he saw a homeless man who had no socks. Mack stopped, removed his socks, and gave them to the man.  "Thank you," the man said, "but do you have a minute? I really appreciate the socks, but I could use someone to talk to. People give me food and money, but nobody ever talks to me." Mack sat down next to the man and spent the next fifteen minutes talking, just talking. The man asked which Mack preferred, Dunkin Donuts or Starbucks, random small talk. And they just talked. It cost Mack nothing and it offered another human being connection and dignity and worth. When Mack recounted the incident, he said, "Ma, he only wanted someone to talk to. I could do that."

As I go into this school year I hope I don't forget how valuable what we do is. In this fast paced, social media driven world there are lots of hashtags about communication and plenty of slogans, but the real impact is sometimes simply seeing another person and taking the time to talk.

Enough IS Enough

Next week I start my 36th year as an SLP. THIRTY-SIXTH YEAR! Somehow I thought it was 37, but I guess it just feels that way. :) I am fairly happy with where my journey has taken me. I've grown both professionally and personally, but haven't quite reached that point of complete satisfaction. I still compare myself to young SLPs with their cute Teachers Pay Teachers stores. I still compare myself to the seasoned ASHA SLPs with their positions and professional clout. I compare, I compare, I compare. ENOUGH!

I am reading Brené Brown's Daring Greatly and she purports that much of society's problems are rooted in the "fear of being ordinary." Our social media feeds are clogged with posts of people living seemingly extraordinary lives. I know when I see posts I think, "What am I doing wrong? Why doesn't my life look so spectacular?" Brown digs deeper and describes a "culture of scarcity." In our culture of scarcity we never have enough and sadly when comparing ourselves to the perfectionism social media and media in general underscores, we never will.


As I read, I thought about how I could combat this as I approach a new school year. It occurred to me a series of daily affirmations about what I have that is enough might be a great place to start. Now, this doesn't mean I stop here, I can always do more, but where I am today is good enough for today. Tomorrow will bring something else, another change, a growth moment. So without further ado...
As an SLP:

• I am good enough
• I am successful enough
• I am competent enough
• I am talented enough
• I am creative enough
• I am compassionate enough
• I am smart enough
• I am professional enough
• I am thorough enough
• I am empathetic enough
• I am clever enough
• I am valued enough
• I am well read enough
• I write well enough
• I am organized enough
• I have enough
• I do enough
• I am enough

As a human:

• I am thin enough
• I am funny enough
• I am pretty enough
• My house is good enough
• My husband is good enough
• My children are good enough
• My car is good enough
• My bank account is full enough
• My clothes are good enough
• I am fit enough
• I run fast enough
• I have enough
• I am extraordinary enough
• I am enough

I am enough for me and the handful of people who know, accept, and love me for me. You are enough. So let's stop comparing and start this year doing what we do best. Let's live and be content. WE ARE ENOUGH.

Back to School 2019

Well, here I am, a blast from the past!! It has been a while since my last post, hasn't it? That's okay! I'm being gentle with myself regarding my hiatus and am just going to jump right back into the blogosphere.

In eleven days I will be back at work and although my years in the school system are winding down, I still get butterflies. My head is in a better space than in the past and I am even feeling excited to get back into my routine. I am looking at my future year and my future future. I have the beginnings of a plan and am itching to see how things pan out.

To begin, I have been immersing myself in learning (outside of the required continuing education required for licensure, etc), so back to school has had a literal meaning. I thought I would share what I've been doing and what is coming up, because I think it has in large part kept me jazzed about going back as well as going forward.

1. I have a student who was challenging what I had been taught as an SLP. What I learned and was using didn't seem to be the most effective therapy for his complex articulation disorder. I was picking my friend Sparklle SLP's brain and she mentioned trying the multiple oppositions approach. As much as she tried to explain it to me, I was confused and I wanted to employ it correctly. I bought Phonological Treatment of Speech Sound Disorders in Children: A Practical Guide 1st Edition by Jacqueline Bauman-Waengler and Diane Garcia. This book was a game changer for me. It very clearly described and explained the contrastive approaches for treating phonological disorders. The little guy who was so vexing to me, became my most improved student!
2. At the end of June when most of my students were on field trips, I took a course offered by Karen Dudek-Brannan on vocabulary assessment, vocabulary selection, and vocabulary instruction. She often referred to Contextualized Language Intervention: Scaffolding PreK–12 Literacy Achievement written by Teresa Ukrainetz. This is my next purchase and read!
3. ASHA Connect in Chicago, need I say more? Well, okay. Many folks aren't always satisfied with the ASHA conferences/conventions. They walk away wanting more. To that I say, "go get more!" It's impossible to provide deep information in 90 minutes. I view these conferences as an opportunity to travel, connect with friends, meet new people, explore the exhibit hall, and if a particular topic whets my appetite, I seek out more information on my own. That's my responsibility as a lifelong learner.
4. While doing ESY this summer, another student left me with questions. This was not a student I had evaluated, so I didn't have a history. Again, I wasn't quite sure what was happening and asked some questions of my friend Pam, of Small Talk.  She questioned the possibility of tongue tie. Many years earlier I had purchased a book called, Tongue Tie: from confusion to clarity-a guide to the diagnosis and treatment of Ankyloglossia. Apparently Carmen Fernando's monograph is a definitive work. At the time I had been curious about the subject, (I did not pay the $250.00 it now costs), but had no pressing need to read the book.  Now I did, and it was GREAT.  I wonder what took me so long? :)
5. Late July brought the SLP Summit, which was quite good. I took 5 of the 8 webinars offered and again was inspired to learn more.
6. As an SLP working in the schools my salary is dependent on "steps" and credits beyond my degree. I got my masters degree in 1986! I really had had enough of school. I did get 12 credits beyond my masters but I need 15 to increase my salary. So, I'm finally taking an online course; The Practice and Power of Vulnerability in the Classroom. While I don't have a classroom, I think the course has real potential for my work with all students, but particularly those with social pragmatic difficulties. As an added bonus the required reading is Brené Brown's Daring Greatly!
7. The training I am MOST excited for happens in October. I will be embarking on a four day training in orofacial myology. It helps that I was the winner of a $500.00 discount while at ASHA Connect! I am so excited for this and cannot wait to see the doors it opens for me as I begin planning the next chapter in my career.

As SLPs we have ethical responsibilities to ourselves, our profession, and the public as well as a responsibility to maintain professional competence. Personally, I feel these responsibilities have the added bonus of keeping me relevant, focused, competent, and excited to to what I do. Bring on the the 2019-20 school year. It's going to be great!

A Message for Full-Time SLP-Moms

While it may seem like I've abandoned this blog, I haven't! I have a multitude of paper scraps with notes, thoughts and ideas stowed and tucked in a multitude of places. I just took a break. The past twenty years have been spent as a working Mom.  I'm still trying to settle into my empty nest life and I haven't yet found my rhythm nor my place, so today I wanted to share a memory I had as I scrubbed floors.

Many years ago we had friends over for dinner, friends I truly love. It had been a long week and I spent my Saturday cleaning and cooking a turkey dinner. A veritable Thanksgiving feast. As we were tucking into pumpkin pie and coffee, the conversation shifted to parenting. It was then my friend looked at me and said, "Well, you're not a full-time mom."  Six words uttered that have been etched in my memory and heart. My response was simple and to the point, "Make no mistake, I am a full-time Mom."

Often when I worked late on an evaluation, those words echoed. When I had to rush my children out of the house for an early morning meeting, those words echoed. When my husband would bring a pizza to school and we would eat in my speech room, those words echoed.  I have long since forgiven the cavalier attitude that I presume accompanied those words, yet even today those words echoed, forgiven, not forgotten.

Yes, I was and am a full-time SLP, working for both the salary and the benefits that provide dental and health care coverage to my family and now college educations (as well as the love of the job).  I also fondly remember helping with bake sales, waiting for my little ballerina to finish dance class, being the den leader for cub scouts, teaching religious education, kindling a spirit of volunteerism at walks for cancer and life, driving to track meets, cross country meets, lacrosse games, editing college applications, baking bread and washing floors and dirty clothes. I was a full-time Mom, after all, and that was what I did.

I know mom-guilt is real but, I share this to remind all working moms who feel even the slightest tinge of guilt to release it.  I've heard it said that guilt is productive for all of ten minutes, after that it becomes destructive. We work, in large part, to provide for our families, nevertheless we are also models of success, perseverance, love and dedication. Working moms shine in ways that can't be quantified. Be gentle with your professional self and be gentle with your personal self. It was good for me to remember not to take either of my selves too seriously, nor to separate them!

Years have passed since that eventful dinner party. Our kids are both seeking adventures on their own and I have quite a bit more time on my hands. Despite this one thing remains, I am to this day a full-time Mom and I am pleased to say, "In my heart, I always will be."

Today is the day before Thanksgiving and before I begin my cleaning and cooking frenzy (and shopping for a new food processor as mine broke two days ago!), I want to share an email I received from a colleague and dear friend. She retired in 2016 after having enjoyed a storied and fulfilling career, and has kept active with a variety of volunteer activities that draw on her extensive special education background.

Her endeavors provided her with a new base of comparison: new contexts, new teams, and new protocols often highlight how truly fortunate we were in previous employment settings, despite not always realizing that what we had was awesome. She wrote:

"Over the past months in my work with S---, I have come to realize even more what a phenomenal team you are. I have encountered some children whose educational programs are good, certainly, but some that are lackluster and even neglectful and borderline non-compliant with N---.

These are some of the things you all do that I really appreciate:
You contact outside evaluators and medical professionals to make sure you are addressing the needs of the child appropriately, that you're not missing anything, that you gather as much information about the etiology and strategies of each individual child - this takes open-mindedness and awareness that there is always more to learn. It also acknowledges that you are there to help the child learn and grow.

You try your hardest to write IEPs that are meaningful, and then you follow through. Testing, FBAs, consultations, documentation- you do it in a timely manner, and you do it well.

You engage parents in the process, and are respectful about it. You keep in contact with them, you listen to them, and you help them learn about and understand their children. Even if you don't agree with them, you try hard to make sure they know you are all in this together on behalf of the children.

You treat the children with respect. We have all had students that might be harder to appreciate- but you never let the child know.

You are creative and resourceful, with the goal of making learning fun, accessible, and challenging.

I know that some school districts have significant financial limitations. But S--- doesn't have gobs of money either. That never stops any of you.

Thank you."

In the spirit of gratefulness, I would encourage us all to find a moment to tell a colleague what they mean to you, both professionally and perhaps personally. In an age when we are quick to ruminate on what frustrates, annoys, and divides us, words of support and affirmation are more needed than ever before. 

I appreciate and value YOU, for whatever it is you do and for taking the time to read this blog.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Progress Monitoring Resources for Speech-Language Therapy

About a two months ago (hard to believe) I was considering some new goals for a middle school student. I was feeling at a loss in terms of what I could use to monitor present levels. I have some tools that are quite effective, (my freebies are here and here) but I wanted to progress monitor his word finding skills and what I created just didn't cut the muster. I also have some progress monitoring tools I purchased and truth be told, I'm not thrilled with them.  So what to use?

I remembered some books that I used to use ALL. THE. TIME. When new materials become available my tried and true resources get relegated to the back of the cabinet. How sad! As I considered what I had available, I pulled out these materials that are perfect for progress monitoring all manner of targets. Here are a few I will be using now: HELP: Handbook of Exercises for Language Processing, Language Remediation and Expansion: 100 Skill Building Reference Lists, and BESST: Book of Exercises for Successful Semantics Teaching.Why purchase something new, when I already have great resources? These books contain wonderful lists for many, many language goal areas.

There are other sources like these that I think would be extremely useful when progress monitoring including this from Academic Communication Associates, Word Retrieval Activities for Children and these beauties from Thinking Publications.  I haven't used these in years and actually had to retrieve the Warm-up and Working Out books from my attic (did you notice I inventory all my materials?). I believe I bought the Warm-up books when I was I member of the mail order Speech Pathology Book Club! Who remembers that one?

It occurred to me as I was searching for what I thought I needed, that I need search no further than my therapy cupboards. I don't need anything newfangled, I don't need to buy anything else. I need to actually use what I have, because you know what? It's good stuff!

How about you? What do you already have that you can breathe new life into? 

Thoughts from the Back Porch: Back to School

I've begun my 36th new school year and have had an opportunity to reflect on the transformation from my first year as an SLP in 1983 to today.  The arc of my life has been huge and I suppose that is a wonderful thing. I mean, who wants a life that remains stagnant? My final summer post is a simple share of some of the lessons I've learned, lessons that have improved my happiness and relationships.  In sharing, I hope you are able to find among these words one or two chestnuts that you can apply to your own life. It may just be the thing you need.

As you may have read, my husband and I have joined the ranks of the empty nester set.  I haven't embraced this happily, in fact it has been very hard for me and I find the hole left in our home to be akin to the Grand Canyon. I've been thinking about all the things I thought were a big deal while the kids were little and I was juggling motherhood, volunteerism, and a career and I sure do wish I had let more things go. I wish I had not flipped over laundry not in hampers or counters not wiped to my exacting standards. I wish I had said, "No," to early morning meetings scheduled on my time that required us to rush and leave our home in a flurry of frustration. I could have, I should have placed a premium on our time over my job. It's too late now. Now I'm left with memories of me being stressed. Folks, take it from me, if we allow employers to dictate our personal time, they will. So, I would encourage you then to have the courage to say, "This doesn't work for me. Would you consider finding another time?" You won't regret it.

Now for the transformation bit. I have always been a seeker and as a result I am in a perpetual state of searching. The upside is, I often find answers, solutions, resolution, and clarity. I have searched in some pretty wacky places, too.   I’ve explored Forum whereby you can “live an extraordinary life and redefine the very nature of what’s possible.” Ummmm, in just three days, mind you. Fortunately, I never followed through with that one. I was blessed with a UTI and had to cancel. Dodged that bullet!

The best was the energy workshop. At that one I was asked if I wanted to know how many alien implants I had in me. That was followed by whether I wanted to know how many implants were supposed to be in me, their host. By all means, please, tell me how many aliens are living within me, maybe that will explain my weight. I am eating for twelve! With a finger flick and a wave a fellow participant removed the alien implants that needed to reconnoiter with the mothership. I almost lost it when the presenter informed me that, yes, in fact, the x-files are real! Sweet mother of science, all I wanted at that moment was a close encounter with an earthling. Clearly, I am a seeker, I seek transformation, but change happens organically. It doesn’t start, then stop, it’s more fluid; sometimes trickling other times surging. Where I am today I can definitively say, “You’re right, God, I am destined to do more than I thought possible.”

One weekend in 2014 I was planning to attend a weekend workshop that had been recommended by an individual I trusted implicitly. The website got me: “Are you willing to be an empowered human being?” YES! 

Do you want to “eradicate your mind of generated fears while empowering your creative self expression, authenticity, connection, and aliveness?” YES, whatever aliveness is. 

“Are you still looking for the success you feel you deserve?" YES! 

"Do you see negative patterns affecting your relationships with loved ones?"  YESSSSS!! 

"Has the realization of your supposed goals in life, career and marriage left you unsatisfied?” YES, YES, YES!!! 

I’m in! I paid my $400.00, I packed my bag, I filled my cooler, and I was off! Woohoo, healing here I come! After six hours I was running for the door! The next morning roughly 20 insights came to mind and those insights were the impetus for the transformation that I live today. They are the source of my relationships with family, friends and colleagues. Here you go. Take what you want, mull over the rest, or stop reading now, although I do hope you read on.

1. I don’t have to have a breakdown to have a breakthrough. 
2. Often those who profess to hold all the answers demonstrate, practice, and exhibit the same “flaws” they point out in others. I am really okay. I am loved. I am valued. I am appreciated, by God, by my friends, and by my family.
3. I love who I am! 
4. Often those who profess to want to help are hiding behind their altruism. Beware of collusion.
5. I am powerful. 
6. I love who God created me to be. 
7. I love my husband. 
8. I love my children. 
9. I feel a peace and purpose in my life. 
10. I feel a patience I haven’t known. 
11. I feel forgiveness for those in my past who had a hand in my trauma. It all really doesn’t matter. 
12. I am powerfully in love with God who has blessed me with these insights. 
13. I don’t have to do it all. I only have to do what matters. 
14. Many will spin a situation to substantiate their design. 
15. Many will make judgments without the facts and present them as truths. That’s their interpretation of the truth. Remain grounded in what's healthy for the mind, body, and soul. 
16. The people you think you can trust will not be there if they are challenged, afraid, or want to preserve their agenda. Trust God. Lean on him, not man. 
17. I am loved by the King of the Universe. What do I fear? Nothing! 
18. I can be wrong; whatever! 
19. My husband means more to me than anyone. 
20. I don't need to search any further than my faith. Anything else is a wolf in sheep's clothing. Stay grounded.
21. Group think is dangerous and disconcerting.
22. I let go. I am free!

I am telling you, that at that point while I was a believer I was not willing to give all of myself to his work. I was not willing to give up who I wanted to be and that is where my anxiety came from. My anxiety stemmed from my resistance to being all that I could be. I could transform to a point, but I still wanted to be accepted by others and conformed by their standards. I now understand that I had to yield to what I have been designed to be. I had to transform into what I have been designed to be. I want to share all of me without fearing my inadequacies, my self-doubt, my concerns with what others will think.

I am entering this new school year empowered like no year before. I don't fear what I might be asked to do. I am transformed with courage and strength. My encouragement comes in knowing I am not alone and would never be asked to do more than what I am capable of doing. It will be a good year. I am sure there will be difficult days, with difficult situations and difficult people. Difficult days don't mean I have to dive in headlong into the drama, it doesn't mean I have to collude. I can practice my "art of the pause," breathe and behave in a reasonable fashion acting as someone who has done this for 35 years. Yes, there will be difficult days, but they don't stop the clock, tomorrow will arrive. Then we have a chance to start again knowing who we are and living as those who accept who we are designed to be. Have a wonderful school year!

My last shots of summer...